


The Angel Who Came to Tea

by seoyovngho



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angel!Au, M/M, Rated T for swears, i havent written for this ship in two years but this chapter got me, modern!AU, no spoilers!, this fic does pretty much what it says on the tin, this is an aim at comedy and sort of toes the line at crack without being crack you know, violently ignores chapter 82
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-11
Updated: 2016-06-11
Packaged: 2018-07-14 08:53:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 983
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7164146
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seoyovngho/pseuds/seoyovngho
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jean loves surprises, but even this one takes the cake.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Angel Who Came to Tea

Jean was expecting to come home from work, toe his shoes off, fall onto the couch and then watch The Office for four straight hours before passing out in bed at 11:30. Maybe order Chinese if he was feeling like treating himself. However, life is full of unexpected surprises and Jean was certainly surprised to open his door to find a naked blond man, stood in the middle of his kitchen eating peanut butter out of a jar. Oh, and that man had giant fucking wings half outstretched coming from his fucking back what the shit?!

Jean has never screamed like a girl (despite what Mikasa told everyone three years ago... that haunted maze was creepy, okay?). But even Jean must admit, that his cry of shock was not the most masculine noise that has ever left his mouth. Once said scream leaves his mouth, he has come to terms with it; because he is comfortable in his masculinity... and because no one heard it. Apart from the fucking ANGEL that made him scream in the first place. Whilst all this was running through Jean's head, he had not realised he had dropped his briefcase as he flung his arms across his eyes yelling, "Naked man!" That was until said briefcase was picked up by said naked man and offered in front of him. Jean lowered his arms slightly. "You got peanut butter all over my briefcase," was not the most graceful thank you, or a thank you at all for that matter, but the man seemed to accept it like he would any gratitude. Maybe what he said was some kind of way to thank someone in angel-speak but Jean wouldn't really know. He's never had much experience with such matters. 

Jean's eyes flick between the briefcase and the (still) naked man in front of him before asking the obvious question, "Who are you?" The man opened his mouth to answer but before he could, Jean asked another obvious question. "Why are you in my apartment?" 

The angel stood back, placed the briefcase down gently and cleared his throat. "My name is Armin and I'm going to be shadowing you for a while." He offered his (peanut butter covered) hand out for Jean to shake. There was a moment where both Armin and Jean looked at the outstretched hand, then at each other. Armin retracted his hand. "Anyway, I'm looking forward to learning a lot from you," Armin smiled in a way that could only be described as angelic. 

"Wait, what?" Jean was thrown for a loop. "You're going to be shadowing me? Learning from me? Why are you naked, how did you get in here?" 

"Oh. I'm an angel." Armin laughed awkwardly. "Kinda thought the wings would give me away." Armin motioned to the wings sticking, quite obviously, out of his back. 

Jean's face dropped realising how stupid he must look. "Yeah, that's uh, that's a very good point." He stuttered awkwardly. "So why are you shadowing me? Why are you still naked?!" 

Armin moved back to the jar of peanut butter he left on the counter. "Every now and again we get sent down to Earth to check up on things, make sure we're kept in the loop on a personal level."

Armin says it so nonchalantly that Jean has to take a few more seconds to register what Armin had said, and also continue diverting his gaze from Armin's junk that is right there!! "And uh what about the clothing, the uh naked thing what about that?" 

Armin wing's wrap around his front, covering up exposed skin. He muttered something that sounded like "In the Renaissance they loved this shit. I'd be carved into a statue by now."

"Okay, I'm glad that's sorted for now. I'll find you some proper clothes." Jean toed off his shoes before shuffling into his room to find some clothes that wouldn't dwarf Armin. He closed the door behind him to take a breath before settling on a clean white t-shirt and long pyjama shorts. Jean reopened the door to find Armin posing in front of the glass window, wings wrapped around his front still... which exposed his bare ass. "Oh! Wow okay! That is... wow alright." Jean stumbled over his words at the sudden view. 

Hearing Jean's approving noises of surprise, Armin turned quickly, peeking out coyly over the edge of his wings. "Doesn't this look like a porno cover? Or something out of a cheesy romance novel." The angel laughed brightly, posing with obscene faces, moving his body slightly, imitating a model on a photo shoot. 

"How would you know that?" Jean asked as he placed the clothes down on his couch. "Aren't angels meant to be righteous and pure or something?" Jean opened the fridge to grab a beer to find half the leftover cake from his birthday had been eaten.

Armin laughed hard at that comment. He unwrapped himself from his wings, moving towards the clothing provided for him. "I've been on many porn shoots in my existence. A previous... client of mine was hard worker trying to make a decent living as a fluffer. Do you know what a fluffer is, Jean?" Jean wished that Armin had put the shorts on first, because his eyes flicked down to the angel's dick briefly when the question was asked. But Armin took the silence as lack of knowledge. "A fluffer is someone who sucks an actor's di-"

"YES THANK YOU, ARMIN. I KNOW." Jean yelled, much louder than he had intended. Armin seemed unphased, and tied the string of his shorts. Armin was clearly about to say something but was interrupted by the sound of Jean's doorbell. "Who the fuck is that?" The question was rhetorical and Jean stomped over to the door not expecting an answer from Armin.

"Oh that must be the pizza guy. Hope you have cash!" 

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote my own summary and laughed for like 30 seconds after. also im terrible at endings.


End file.
